Hi, Aadi here. I am chatting with Miranda Prospero of Prostpero Lost by L. Jagi Lamplighter
[Aadi] Who or what are you? What are your vitals? (age, sex, species)
[Miranda] I am Miranda Prospero of the Family Prospero. I am the daughter of the Dread Magician Prospero. You may have heard of us. Shakespeare wrote a play about us. It is called The Tempest.
I grew up on a deserted island, with only Aerie Ones and an odious creature called Caliban for playmates. I have never fit in well with human beings, despite having lived among them since the late 1500s.
[Aadi] What part do you play in the story?
[Miranda] I run Prospero Incorporated. Prospero Inc. keeps the supernatural world from destroying or enchanting human beings. When my father, Prospero, disappears, I ask Mab, the company gumshoe to help me find him. While he does this, I endeavor to carry out the last instruction that he left—which was to find the other members of our family, my younger brothers and sisters, and warn them that something called the Three Shadowed Ones are hunting for the magical staffs Father made for each of us.
[Aadi] How would you describe your book?
[Miranda] I keep a journal. So, what you are reading is my first hand account of our travels and adventures.
It is for the most part straight forward, though I must admit that I do not, at first, tell the real story of what happen with Prince Ferdinand after the events recorded in The Tempest.
[Aadi] Tell me about where you live? Who do you live with?
[Miranda] I live in an enormous mansion in the mountains of Oregon. Some hallways have arches of lintels of ivory that lead into other dimensions, a huge underground Vault filled with magical objects my family have “retired from circulation.”
There is also a Great Hall that has been moved several times. It came most recently from Boston in the early 20th century. Before that, we lived in Scotland and before that in Milan. The Great Hall has always come with us when we’ve moved.
Did I mention that my family has been around for a while?
The Great Hall houses statues of each of us carved by my eldest brother, Mephistopheles. Each statue was designed to hold a staff—the staffs of power our father made for us. The staffs that, according to my father’s most recent note, are being hunted by The Three Shadowed Ones.
No other human beings live in this mansion, but there is our faithful butler, Ariel—who is forever asking for his freedom. Gets rather tedious, really—my familiar Tybolt the Cat, whom I must sadly admit is rather uppity though he is an excellent familiar, and a number of other Aerie Ones, air spirit servants.
Occasionally, one of my siblings drop by for a visit. The most recent time was a few months ago. My brother Mephisto dropped by. Or, rather, he tried to drop by. He was drunk, so I sent him away. He kept mumbling about how someone had stolen his sta…
Hold on a second!
[Aadi] What’s the most important thing in your life right now?
[Miranda] Until recently, my life had two goals:
To keep Prospero Inc. running—so that the supernatural world does not destroy mankind. (Remember that last hurricane? That is what happens when we miss a shipment.)
To become a Sibyl of my Lady Eurynome, who is called by many, the Unicorn.
Everything changed, however, the night I found the note from my father. It said:
I have unwittingly unleashed powers best kept bound. If I fail to constrain them, they shall destroy me and all I have wrought. If you have not seen me since the writing of this message, assume the worst and warn the family. Counsel my children to keep close the gifts I have bestowed.
Beware the Three Shadowed Ones!
Now my goal is to find my brothers—oh, and I suppose my sister, too. You would understand my reluctance if you met her—and warn them of this menace.
Alas, I have lost track of many of them. Luckily, Prospero Inc. keeps a company gumshoe on the payroll. I am waiting for him now in the Everblooming Garden behind Prospero Mansion.
[Aadi] What do you hope nobody ever finds out about you?
[Miranda] That I did not actually spurn Ferdinand. He jilted me. Or at least, he never showed up for our wedding, and I heard later that he was seen elsewhere, sailing the world.
But sailors’ rumors are notoriously unreliable, and I never did quite trust that my uncle Antonio had truly repented his crimes against my father.
[Aadi] What do you like or dislike about the other characters from your book?
[Miranda] Oh, don’t get me started!
First and foremost, I despise my brother Erasmus. He is despicable and spiteful! Italian girls have black hair. Mine is silver. Why? Ask Erasmus Prospero and the Staff of Decay.
My brother Mephisto was once the greatest swordsman in Christendom and a great scholar and magician, too. Then he went mad. Now he is a hopeless fool. It breaks my heart. (And, yes, Mab, I do actually have a heart.)
Theophrastus I love, but the boy has given up magic. He’s grown old. If he keeps it up, he’ll… I can’t bear to even think the words.
Then there is my blind brother Cornelius. He is cold and reptilian and power hungry. I’ve never really connected with him. But, Cornelius rob Prospero Inc? Ha! The Three Shadowed Ones will have to try harder than that!
Logistilla? My sister is thoroughly annoying! She could be quite a fine woman, but she is consumed by envy. Oh, and there’s her bad habit of turning her ex-lovers into animals. Did I mention she has the Staff of Transmogrification?
Once mighty Titus has become so lazy, he no longer even sends a birthday card. Ulysses is a klepto.
If only we could find Father. He could force the others to straighten up and fly right!
[Aadi] In your opinion, what is your best feature?
[Miranda] My best feature? I would say it was my devotion to Father. For over four hundred years he has told me what to do, and so I have done so.
[Aadi] What’s the worst thing someone ever did to you?
[Miranda] Before the story starts? Or after? In Book Two, the worst thing that could happen to me does. I will not speak of that.
Before that? I would say probably Ferdinand not showing up for my wedding. That…rather put a damper on my life for some time.
Oh, and there was that elf who made a tryst with me and never showed up. He sent Mephisto with an apology. Mephisto was drunk that time, too. Or…was he? You know, that might have been the first time I saw Mephisto after he lost his wits.
Where is that elf? Maybe he knows what happened to my brother.
[Aadi] What’s the worst thing you’ve done to someone?
[Miranda] I did not give Water of Life to Eramus’s wife when she was dying. At the time, I thought I was following Father’s wishes, but…it has led to such sorrows.
[Aadi] Read any good books? What were they?
[Miranda] All books. I read all books. Any I can get my hands on, at least. But the book I really want is the Scroll of the Sybil that tells about her order. That one, I cannot find.
And I have been looking for well over four hundred years.
[Aadi] What type of places do you hang out in?
[Miranda] Hang out? I do not hang out.
I work at my office in Prospero Inc.’s headquarters. I work at home. That is what I do. At least until Father’s letter pushes me to have to travel, but after that?
Mab and I go to Chicago looking for Mephisto. We fly to Vermont to visit Theo. We sail through the Caribbean seeking for Logistilla, and, well, you won’t believe where we spend Christmas! I do hope that Mab and Mephisto didn’t get in the way of the elves while I was unconscious due to an injury on Christmas Eve. I understand that is their busiest night.
[Aadi] What annoys you more than anything else?
[Miranda] My family. Particularly Erasmus.
And Unicorn Hunters, though I think terror might be a better adjective than fear for that accursed crowd.
What is Mephisto doing with a Unicorn Hunter’s cloak!!
[Aadi] What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?
[Miranda] The Unicorn. She is like nothing you have ever seen, all lightning white and lovely beyond compare.
And storms, I love storms more than I love almost any other thing. The most beautiful thing I have ever seen would definitely have to be the Unicorn in a storm.
[Aadi] What kind of weather is your favorite?
Obviously. That was easy. The Aerie Ones have been my friends since childhood, and my magic staff, the Staff of Winds, plays a song which they must obey. It is made from the pine in which the witch Sycorax trapped Ariel. When I play it, winds and rain and thunderheads all dance to my tune.
It is glorious!
[Aadi] Do you have any pets? Do you want any pets? What kind?
[Miranda] I have a familiar, but he is, as I mentioned above, rather uppity. I suspect if you asked Tybolt, he would tell you that he had me.
He is a black cat, graceful and snide.
My brother Mephisto, on the other hand, has dozens of pets. He is a beast tamer. He can tame anything. Did I mention that he carries theStaff of Summoning?
[Aadi] Do you have any magical items? Where did you get them?
[Miranda] First and foremost, I have the Staff of Winds—the staff that controls the Aerie Ones, the wind spirits. I received it from my father, who made it. He made a staff for each of his children. I am not sure how he did it.
Now that you mention it, I am not sure what happened to his magic books, the ones he used when I was young, either…
But the flute is not all I carry. I have a fighting fan made by the Japanese smith god. It is not magical, but it is very well made. It has been said to slice the wind.
I have an enchanted tea dress that cannot be penetrated and never gets dirty. It is emerald green. Matches my eyes. My sister Logestilla made it. She made an enchanted outfit for each of us. Each in the color and style of our choosing. We all wear different colors, except for Erasmus, who chose dark green…probably just to irk me.
And I have the most precious thing of all: a vial of Water of Life Water of Life can cure all ills and makes men immortal—if they take a drop a year. It also has many other uses.
To get this Water, I have to travel for a year and a day to the Well at the World’s End, and I can only bring back as much as I can carry in a crystal carafe.
Nowadays, when I am running Prospero Inc., it is hard for me to get away for such a long time. If only my family were still working together. We used to be so impressive. How did we go wrong?
[Aadi] If you could change anything in your book, what would it be and why?
[Miranda] Interesting question. Do you mean in the recording of my story? Or in my life? And if, in my life, do you mean things under my control or things not under my control?
There are a great many things I might wish to change, but I think the more interesting question is: Would I want to change the same things at the end of my story that I think I wish to change at the beginning?
Now that is an interesting question…
[Aadi] Okay, final and most important question. Who would play you in the movie?
[Miranda] Ideally, I would pick Lauren Bacall. No actress has mastered giving the impression of cool intelligence the way she did. But, alas, it is too late for that.
The new cover for my book shows an image of me based on the lovely English actress, Lily James, whom, I believe, is dating the Eleventh Doctor. (Yes, of course, he is actually a Time Lord. The idea that he is a human actor is merely a cover set up by the Orbis Suleimani, the Circle of Solomon—the secret organization set up by King Solomon to protect men from the ravages of the supernatural. )
Lily James is a tad young, but time will cure that. Or the Time Lord will.